51 Things Road Camelot Is Not Allowed to Do
by Exile Wrath
Summary: Love is war. And this is Lenalee, Kanda, Tyki, and Lavi's declaration against one certain Noah. And Allen's protests.


**Exile wrath: shoot. Great, I created another oneshot :/ Implied EveryonexAllen (except Rei) (NOTE: Thanks for the suggestion, psycho-cology!)**

_Allen_

Lenalee

Kanda

**Lavi**

**_Tyki_**

**Rei**

**51 Things Road Camelot is not allowed to do**

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><p><em>1. Road is not allowed to join Lenalee in her fangirling<em>

_2. I don't like yaoi_

_3. Rhode is not allowed to kiss me_

_4. As Lenalee, Kanda, Tyki, and Lavi will assault me later, trying to "cleanse my mouth"_

_5. Spare me. Please_

_6. And no offense, but I don't like lolitas (unlikeCOUGHEarlCOUGH)_

_7. Also, you've already tried to kill me…twice, already._

_8. Road is not allowed to disappear into nowhere,_

_9. because Sheryl will go crazy again_

_10. Road is not allowed to call me "Moyashi". YOU'RE SHORTER THAN ME!_

11. Road is not allowed to ask me what certain Japanese doujinshi phrases mean

12. when she already knows them by heart

13. and all she wants is to see if I get a reaction

14. She is not allowed to leave said doujinshi anywhere around my immediate vicinity.

15. Road is not allowed to ask me if I'd like Moyashi to be my uke

16. because I like my soba left in my stomach, not vomited in the sink -. -

17. and what exactly are you doing in the Order?

18. Road is not allowed to kiss Moyashi.

19. He's mine

20. Road is not allowed to ask me if I like Lavi.

**21. Road is not allowed to disappear.**

**22. I think I broke my back last time Sheryl threw me when that happened**

**23. Road is not allowed to draw me and Moyashi together**

**24. because Kanda gets mad. (By the way, how much are you selling them for?)**

**25. and excuse ME, but I like my head where it is**

**26. Road is not allowed to call Allen Moyashi**

**27. HE'S MY MOYASHI**

**28. Road is not allowed to gross me out with yaoi stuff (that's not Laven)**

**29. Lenalee is not allowed to gross Rei out with yaoi stuff**

**30. Scratch that, Road is not allowed to show ANYONE yaoi stuff**

**31. I DON'T WANT THEM TO GET ANY IDEAS!**

32. Road is not allowed to go yuri on me

33. I in love with Allen, thank you very much

34. Road is not allowed to hack my fanfiction account

35. I DON'T LIKE YURI!

36. Road is not allowed to steal any of my manga books

37. Road is not allowed to use me as a doll

38. You have a REALLY bad fashion sense, no offense.

39. Road is not allowed to draw yuri doujins

40. If Allen finds them again, he's going to think I'm lesbo TT. TT

**_41. Road is not allowed to kiss Cheating Boy A_**

**_42. He's my favorite poker friend_**

**_43. Road is not allowed to ask me if I would like Lavi to be my uke_**

**_44. Allen's much better…(drool)_**

**_45. Road is not allowed to tell Sheryl that I like Allen_**

**_46. I don't like my stupidly sadistic brother_**

**_47. Wait, Road is not allowed to tell ANYONE that I like him_**

**_48. 3 Exorcists, two of them Critical point, would not be fun to fight against_**

**_49. Road is not allowed to give me Poker Pair dreams_**

**_50. these walls are THIN_**

"DONE!" Tyki exclaimed triumphantly, setting down the pencil and receiving odd looks from the surrounding Exorcists.

"Exactly how and when did you get in here?" Rei asked with a glare after an awkward silence. Tyki shrugged.

"I needed to run from Road." He stated matter-of-factly, neck hairs rising as he saw Kanda, Lenalee, and Lavi give him vicious glares from behind his Al- a candle suddenly threw itself at his cheek. Allen and Lenalee flinched at the drill-like feature of the candle, and all six people turned around slowly at Road's childlike laughter. "Oh. Shit." Tyki gasped as he fled through the floor.

"Allen-KUN!" Road yelled, leaping in the air to glomp Allen, but Lavi, Lenalee, and Kanda knocked her down and tossed the Noah out the window. Rei sighed and shook her head, picking up the pencil and scribbling something on the page.

**51. Road is not allowed to go in Allen's room and assault him at any time, unless she wants to get her nose smashed by his admirers.**

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><p><strong>So? Like it? Hate it? Love it? I hope I didn't offend any RoadxAllen fans...<strong>

**Review?**


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